How LOTR Should Of Ended

Please, no one kill me for thinking this is funny.

WARNING: Contains animated mooning

My New Favorit Peice Of Art

That's Picasso's signature. I wish I could make somthing like that. (The author smirks at his ingenious sarcastic coment!)

Ch. 5 Girlish Emotions

"I don't understand... I could have sworn it was just around here!"

Scott and Angelina had been searching for the path for over two hours, but they just seemed to be as lost as when they had started. Scott was becoming agitated for he had always dreamed of saving a damsel in distress, but this rescue was turning out to be more like his worst nightmare insted of that dream, and the bad thing is that his worst nightmare was of him getting lost and than ending up in a cheesy blog reading this weird story over and over again while listening to the Yental soundtrack and Ice Ice Baby.

"Hey, you look kindof agitated," came Angelina's soothing voice, "I know we'll find the path. It can't be far."

"I'm a failure! I can't even find the stupid path!" Scott's yelling startled Angelina. "This is it for us... I wish I was stronger, but..." he couldn't even finish the sentance. At the speed of lightning and with the intent to shut up his pathetic mouth came Angelina's hand, as she backhanded his dome. "O, shut up. Stop acting like this is your fault... We wouldn't be in this situation if it weren't meant to be! Grow up, stop acting like such a sissy, and be a man!"

Scott was stunned. He was also in pain from getting man handled by a girl. And I don't mean just physical pain. As they say, he was demoralized. This hadn't happened to him since 3rd grade when his younger brother Zach "pantsed" him in front of a Kroger super market.

"Sorry... I needed that. I've got it together... now lets jut find this path and get home."

"O, I'm not going home when we find this path. I'm on a mission," came Angelina's now stern voice. (Her stern voice had back handed her soothing voice) "Those darn cows best hope I don't ever find them... 'cause there will be hell to pay!"

Noah

He built an ark, now
can he win a national
championship?
The Florida Gators are
one of the Final Four
teams headed to
Indianapolis.
All the number 1 seeds
have been knocked off
and Florida is the only
remaning team that
I go for.
To bad Duke and Gonzaga
couldn't be there, that
would have been the chance
for J.J. Redick to take on
Adam Morrison. I guess
they'll have to wait for the
NBA

Some Fresh Tunes

A while back Matt had me listen to The Postal Service and I was like "dude, I'm all about this fresh remix of Nintendo sound". Ever since then I have been on the lookout for more of this sound. I checked out the band Death Cab (for Cutie), whose lead singer is one of the members of The Postal Service and I love the new Beck album and it's subsiquent remix releases (Ghettochip Malfunction rocks man!). But it wasn't until I stumbled upon the band Ace Bad that I realized the full potential of Nintendo Rock. You have to check this out baby! I repeat, it is imparitive that you listen to Ace Bad ( <--- this is a link)

There's only one good kind of snow...

As Winter winds down to make way for Spring I thought it would be interesting to debunk all these people who love snow and think it is beautiful... "Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves." Adam and Eve were naked. Before they sinned they were completely and even totally naked. Therefore the temperature must have been between 67 and 78 degrees (Fahrenheit) at all times. The Garden of Eden never could have seen snow prior to the eating of the Forbidden Fruit. Therefore snow, at least man's experience of it is a product of sin. I'm not saying there wasn't snow, somewhere, very far away from Adam and Eve, but not until sin entered the picture would they have known about it.

I see that some of you out in the mountains and perhaps in the midwest are experiencing a little bit of late snow here in the past few days. What a great reminder that we live in a fallen world and one day when all this suffering and anguish is over it'll be nice and toasty again.

Not Dead Yet

Some of our faithful readers may be wondering, "where have all the Crum's gone (long time passing)?" I just wanted to assure you all, we are not gone for good. There have been a few developments in the Crum Clan that have made posting on a regular basis a lower priority than it has been in the past. Here are the three primary reasons for "lack of posting":

First: A large scale Crum Conference has been in the works and is now underway in the Baltimore area (the exact location of which is classified information). Of course this makes posting blog updates not only more difficult in terms of free-time but also carries certain security issues that must be dealt with in a sensitive manner.

Second: The NSA has recently revoked the right of the Crum Clan to access high bandwidth internet. This ruling is currently being appealed by the Crums, but a source in Washington says hearings may take months if not years. "The Families recent relocation to the Baltimore/Washington area has raised concerns that a national takeover may be in the works" states the Washington source, "currently all options are on the table for dealing with this severe issue."

Third: There haven't been any good movies to write about in the past 3 weeks.


"We were first alerted to the threat of the Crums when they made an offer to buy the White House and then claimed that it wasn't big enough" - Chief of Staff, Andrew H. Card, Jr.

TWISTED LOGIC

I have only three things to say about the super sweet band Coldplay.

1) If you haven't heard of them than you need to go back to whatever stupid country you came from.

2) If you don't own all of their albums than you need to go buy them.

3) And...If you haven't gotten out to see the Twisted Logic Tour than you, and I stress, NEED to get up, stop what you're doing, and go see it.